001. [Action for New Bark/Video]

[preybeforemeals]

[ACTION]

[It would be very, very easy to have some sort of meltdown over this.

Really, if anything he'd think it would be warranted; he's not supposed to be here, he has no clue who this woman was earlier but she most definitely is not his mother, and the fact that she'd responded to his questioning by trying to sit him down and make him lunch (which he had immediately refused, but he had accepted the coffee, and she made startlingly good coffee) had done exactly nothing to assuage the sense that something is horrifically wrong here. However, it seemed that the field in which Mom grows her fucks is utterly barren, and he'd ended up locked outside before too long.

At least she'd let him keep the coffee.

So there was that, and there had been a brief moment of rage at the door before he'd settled himself, running his free hand back through his hair and muttering something under his breath; come on, Tsukiyama, you've handled worse than this. Calm down. Don't react to it. Be cool.

The rest of the day had been given to the locals; they were surprisingly helpful if you asked the right questions, even if what they'd told him had been completely inane. They seemed rather interested in assisting him in preparing for this...journey he was supposed to be on, even if no one really knew why he was supposed to be on it; asking about that had just gotten a lot of "well, that's just what we do."

It seemed this place was a little backwards.

So. Panicking was going to get him nowhere, this journey would presumably get him...somewhere, logically there was really only one thing to do with that knowledge.

Late afternoon would find him sitting on a low wall outside of one of the incredibly few buildings in town; he's got the bag he'd received from Mom sitting at his feet, and he has the Trainer Handbook out across his lap. He's a bit hard to miss given his, uh, attire, but he seems to have pulled a pen from somewhere and he's apparently contenting himself with making notes in the margins of that book he's going through.

Sure, he's gripping that pen a bit too hard and those notes are getting downright ugly with the force with which he's writing them, but he's perfectly fine, thank you very much. One of the few respectable people to arrive today, from the look of it. Totally calm. Completely calm. He's fine.

...yeahno he's wound tightly enough to jump approximately half a mile if he's approached, but at least he's putting an effort in.]



[VIDEO]

[Some time that evening, however, he actually finds the general coherency required to address the network; it takes him a while to work out whether he really wants to attach his physical appearance to the message - old habits die hard, after all, and he runs in several societal circles where keeping your appearance to yourself is literally a matter of whether you're fond of staying alive or not - but after a while...well, if there's someone else here that he actually wants to know about, this would probably be the fastest way to get their attention. So. Video it is.]

Ah, hello there! It's a pleasure to meet you all, even if it's not in person - it seems that several of us are in the same...distressing situation. I mean, the locals don't seem very fazed by it, they were very kind to me, but I still found it a bit unsettling that they don't seem bothered by what looks like a mass kidnapping to me. Am I to understand that this is just a misunderstanding, or...?

[...]

...But we don't have to discuss that if you don't want to! I'd just like to hear a bit more about the other people who have found themselves here. It's been a very long day, you see, and I'd like having someone to talk to; I'd ask if any of my friends are here, but I'm positive they would have contacted me already if they were.

[ugh, he can only handle doing so much more of this chirpy bullshit before he makes himself positively sick; normally it's not a problem at all, but given the circumstances he is really not here for this today -

He glances offscreen somewhere before he continues speaking; he doesn't seem to be focusing on anything in particular, it seems he's just trying to find something to look at.]

So tell me about yourselves, if you don't mind! Where you came from, what sorts of things you can do there. I've heard that some people have gone through some charming transformations lately...is that something we're supposed to blindly accept as well...?

I've heard some interesting stories, and read many more; this place is almost like a storybook itself, really. But it's just poor writing to expect this much suspension of disbelief from one's audience, captive or not.

Comments

[ossifragant]

[He raises his brows, his expression serious.]

I wouldn't say that. it's more accurate to say it happens and then you deal with it.

[preybeforemeals]

Oh...? I wouldn't know.

[Tsukiyama, please.]

I'd think it would be a bit more alarming than that, though - you'd think it would drive some to an outright crisis.

[ossifragant]

No? How fortunate for you.

[Whether or not he believes him isn't entirely clear. His tone is casual enough that he might be taking him at his word.]

It looks like that kid is taking it pretty rough. I'd call that a crisis.

[preybeforemeals]

Oh, likewise. Though I have to wonder if you're speaking from experience as well, or just observation...?

[I mean you seem a bit cavalier about it either way.]

[ossifragant]

[He does this.]

There are plenty of people who talk about having been changed upon coming here. It's all a matter of listening carefully enough.

[But that's not exactly admitting anything.]

[preybeforemeals]

And that's not an answer, monsieur, but I'll keep that in mind.

[ossifragant]

If you want an answer, you'll have to answer a question of mine.

[preybeforemeals]

[Now, that's interesting.]

You're more than welcome to ask.

[ossifragant]

Why ask about people changing? It's rather odd for an opener. Did you happen to notice it upon looking at the device and you were curious or is there something more to it than that?

[He's not expecting an honest answer, so he's going to be looking for slight reactions.]

[preybeforemeals]

[He just laughs a bit at that, really.]

So you're going to keep pursuing that, are you? Dolce, dolce...I like it when people are persistent.

However, there's not much to tell, I'm afraid! I noticed, so I asked. I'm a curious man, what can I say?

[ossifragant]

[That doesn't give him much to work with so he shrugs, giving a mild smile.]

So I see.

To answer your question, yes, I do have personal experience on the matter.

[Should he be open about this? Probably not, but he's been loudly talking about it for nearly half a year already.]

[preybeforemeals]

[He's been living among humans for years now, in a place where that runs a great risk of getting him killed. He knows better than to leave terribly obvious tells in his wake; suspicions, maybe, but flat-out reacting to something like that isn't exactly going to be a thing.]

Is that so...? What were you before, if you don't mind?

locked;

[ossifragant]

[This is one of those things where he'd either outright state what he is or sidestep the issue by saying it's not something the man would be familiar with. It's not a lie, but then, Greed has never denied being a homunculus. Going into details about his species is out of the question. Not with a stranger at any rate. Still, he flashes a knowing smile and quickly switches over to a private channel.

Just in case.]

I'm a homunculus. Most people here are unfamiliar with the term.

[preybeforemeals]

[...Huh.]

I've only heard of them in a philosophical sense; sometimes they're used in thought experiments and the like. I can't say I've ever met one in person.

I appreciate being given the opportunity.

[ossifragant]

[He wonders what they could be in a philosophical sense. It must be different, he's certain there must be things similar between the terms, though that might be more personal philosophy than anything else.]

You flatter me.

[preybeforemeals]

Nothing of the sort, good sir - if something interests me I don't see why I shouldn't say so, and experiences outside of my own definitely interest me.

Where are you from, if you don't mind?

[ossifragant]

[This has the potential to go south very quickly. He should really avoid talking at great length about himself because he always reveals too much when he does.

So of course he's going to keep on talking.]

It's a small country called Amestris.

[preybeforemeals]

[...god bless people like you.]

Now that I've never heard of.

[ossifragant]

I'm not surprised. This is another one of those rather interesting things about this place. People come from all over.

Just like that kid claiming he doesn't normally look human.

[preybeforemeals]

I didn't even ask him; I imagined any discussion might be better suited for after the meltdown.

[ossifragant]

Probably. In any case, he might not be too helpful.

[Well, maybe he'd make more sense to the stranger than to Greed. 1915 and all that.]

The reason you've never heard of my country is because it doesn't exist where you're from, I'm assuming. You get used to it after a while even if it's unusual.

[preybeforemeals]

Another thing I'm going to have to simply be fine with, I'm assuming?

[But there's a bit of teasing behind his words, a general sense that he's sure as hell not going to take it nearly as seriously as he should.]

It sounds as though you get that sort of reaction often - no one's heard of your country or your species. It sounds horribly rough.

[ossifragant]

[Being serious about something is about the only way to know that shit has gone horribly wrong in Greed's case. By the smirk, he doesn't seem offended at any rate.]

If you want to get all worked up about it, I'm not going to stop you.

[If this person is going to get all bothered by Greed being cavalier as fuck he's not going to even attempt to stop him.]

To be honest, even in my own world I was something of a legendary beast more than reality.

[preybeforemeals]

Oh, don't worry about that - I'm not one to cry on others' behalf. Why should I? If you're fine with it, I see no need to not be.

[Speaking of cavalier as fuck.]

Although if that's truly the case, I should hope you prided yourself on it.

[ossifragant]

[The pompousness between the two of them could power a city.]

Of course I did.

There's noting quite like proving an urban legend true.